In this week’s handle with care, a “Bachelorette” Men Tell All recap and a Tomdaya update.
My favorite genre of celebrity is someone who is intelligently offbeat. Lady Gaga, for example, is one of these celebrities. I live for the way she acts when she promotes movies, like when she described “House of Gucci” as “yummy,” or when she repeated her “100 people in a room” speech for the duration of the “A Star Is Born” press tour. It’s a great marketing tactic because they get headlines from it.
Gwyneth Paltrow is fascinating to me because of this — she famously has a daughter named Apple, and a lifestyle brand called Goop (that has sold insane things like jade eggs meant to go in vaginas). She doesn’t know a thing about the new Boy Katniss Everdeen show on Disney+, but she has obviously listened to, and loves “Red (Taylor’s Version).”
On Wednesday, Goop posted a holiday gift guide starring Paltrow on their YouTube channel. In the video, she wraps gifts from Goop addressed to a few celebrities. I am assuming this was just for video purposes, although I wouldn’t put it past her if she actually sent these out. Adele is getting Goop’s DTF supplement, Stephen Colbert is getting the “This Smells Like My Orgasm” candle, and Kim Kardashian and Pete Davidson are getting a Wolverine claw sex toy.
Last but not least, what will Gywneth Paltrow—the woman that introduced 29-year-old Jake Gyllenhaal to 20-year-old Taylor Swift—put in Miss Swiff’s gift bag? She would be a complete silly billy if she gave her a red scarf… so Tayla gets a vibrator! I secretly hope this gift gets to her because I think she would have a laugh. I mean, what could celebrities possibly gift each other when they have all the money in the world, and could buy anything for themselves?
Good news!!
Baristas at a Starbucks in Buffalo, New York voted 19-8 to unionize, making it the first in the country to form a union. The anti-union crowd should be scared here, because the current labor movement is picking up speed. Kellogg is under fire because they’re trying to hire replacements for their employees that are on strike, but their job portals are down after thousands of fake applications were submitted. Karma’s got a kiss for you!
Speaking of “Good News:” Megan Thee Stallion graduated from Texas Southern University yesterday. She earned her Bachelor of Science degree in Health Administration.
ABBA breaks their silence
The Swedish group got their first ever GRAMMY nomination a few weeks ago, and I did a little “Peanuts” dance to celebrate. It had been 40 years since they released an album before this year’s “Voyage.” Variety asked them for a comment on the nomination, and they hilariously said the following:
The Tomdaya beat
Zendaya and Tom Holland were being h-word on the TL (but in real life) during their “Spider-Man: No Way Home” press tour. Guess we know why she always laughs so hard when she’s around him!
The Bachelorette Week 8 (The Men Tell All) Recap
This week, some of the men that have gotten the boot are back for a two-hour reunion, hosted by Kaitlyn and Tayshia. The main drama of the season was rehashed, but The Men Tell All is mostly a “Bachelor” or “Bachelor in Paradise” audition.
After a season recap, we get into Peter the pizzapreneur and Will’s drama. Kaitlyn asked Peter why he threw Will’s bomber jacket from the “Top Gun” group date in the pool, and he says that Will attacked him, but the rest of the guys said it wasn’t true. Casey — the Dax Shepard lookalike who is absolutely going to be First Sand on “Paradise” next year — said that Peter would only talk about his business. Peter is so proud of his pizza shop, though; that’s how he provides for his mother and sister! And to that Will says: “Tell your sister to stay out of my DMs!” I really did not care at all for this drama until this moment. Everyone was yelling, and Kaitlyn and Tayshia were doing their best to quiet them down. Peter is upset about his pizzeria getting bad reviews and blames Will and his friends for them. Screenshots of these “reviews” are on the big screen, including one that read: “Pizza tasted like it was drenched in pool water.” Hm. Apparently, Will has had Peter’s pizza and thought it wasn’t very good. When Peter is given the last word, he has a “lawyer” serve Will for “defamation of character.” I know this is fake, but Will actually looked upset about this!
Next, Kaitlyn and Tayshia addressed the night one drama with Ryan, the guy that brought a folder full of cheat sheets about the show and Michelle. Casey brought up the fact that he was on “The Bachelor: Live on Stage” before joining the cast for this season, and yeah, it’s suspicious! He apologizes, and they move on to Martin, who said some very problematic things about Michelle before she sent him home. Will says there was a rumor that Martin had a “Girl At Home (Taylor’s Version)” while he was filming, and he only kind of denies it. Kaitlyn said, “And she’s here right now! Just kidding,” which actually made me mad because it would’ve been a moment! Chris S. was also there to be dragged by Rick and Olu. Side note: Olu looked scrumptious in his blood orange suit.
The last villain of the night is Jamie, and he takes a seat on stage across from Kaitlyn and Tayshia. Tayshia asks him what he meant when he said Michelle was on “spring break mode,” and he says that he felt like “one of 20 guys.” That’s the show for you! Rodney just wants Jamie to take accountability for his actions re: spreading the rumor about Michelle and Joe. He justifies it by saying that no one ever asked him directly if he started it, but the men argue that they shouldn’t have had to.
On to the season favorites in the hot seat: first up is Rick, who talks about how hard his breakup with Michelle was. Then the producers brought out a scary-looking cake shaped like his head on a serving cart, just like when he met Michelle for the first time. Before Rodney is brought on stage, for some reason Tayshia’s breakup with Zac is addressed. Weirdest segue ever, but okay. Rodney offers his sentiments to Tayshia, but she is so overcome with emotion she has to step off stage for a little bit. Rodney tells Kaitlyn he understands that the pace of his relationship was slower, but at the end of the day he’ll always be “Team Michelle.” Then Kaitlyn suggests that Rodney may be visiting a beach in Mexico over the summer, alluding to “Paradise.”
There are deleted scenes, a streaker (?), and a sneak peek of Clayton’s “Bachelor” season. They got me with the scene where he’s telling multiple people he’s in love with them and the one where he tells his final two that he slept with both of them during Fantasy Suites. I have to watch it now, I guess. Becca Kufrin is also in the audience with a Thecca update and to let everyone know about “The Bachelor: Live on Stage” coming back.
Finally, Michelle is in the hot seat, and I love this Thanksgiving color scheme she, Kaitlyn, and Tayshia have going on with their outfits. She has kind things to say about Rodney and Rick, and Tayshia asks Jamie if he has anything to tell Michelle. He appreciated how she builds others up, because he likes doing that too. Michelle disagrees with the latter because of his comments about her and the other men. Begrudgingly, Jamie apologizes. Martin opens his mouth again to praise Michelle, but she says he hasn’t learned from his mistakes. He apologizes and so does Chris S. Michelle also admitted that she thinks she may have sent Olu home too early, because she liked that he was looking out for her. Bloopers were shown, and as someone from Southern California, I loved hearing Michelle try to pronounce “Rancho Cucamonga.” Everyone gets pizza from Peter’s pizzeria, and he and Will make amends! This season feels like it went by really fast, but I honestly need a break from all this “Bachelor” content… I want to feel sane again.
I don’t know where Mindy Kaling finds these hot boys for her shows, but I love it!! She found Gavin Leatherwood, who plays Nico on “The Sex Lives of College Girls” on HBOMax, and is known for Netflix’s “Chilling Adventures of Sabrina.” I would say more about him, but don’t want to give anything away in the show. Dylan Sprouse was originally cast in this role, but Miss God had other plans and well… here we are, thankfully.
I finished watching the show this past week, and it was just renewed for a second season. My mom did see me watching it and called it “mensadas,” so you know it’s good! I highly recommend it if you’re looking for a comedy to watch all in one day. Or if you want something to watch while hiding from your family when you’re visiting for the holidays!
Happy Sunday, I hope everyone is doing well. Thank you for reading! 💗